The Divine

Looking straight ahead and unable to move my head, the same presence would appear in my peripheral vision off to my right, about 2 o’clock. Being young, I thought it was in the alcove with all the candles but later realized his presence was superimposed on top of the physical realm and the alcove was simply in that line of sight.

His appearance was similar to looking at a mirage, through the desert heat, but instead of heat, layers of energy fields with an actual presence behind it. Without words, we spoke in the language of divine energy, which I call love, as it flowed back and forth from one to another. Then the dimension closed and I would go about my young life.

Note: It appears to me that the reason The Divine can take on so may forms to the human perception is because it “is” all things. But extrapolating from the form of the The Soul (see below), which is our human personality merged with some aspect of Divine spirit, suggests to me that our soul’s light-body may be a close representation of what The Divine might actually look like… Maybe the biblical definition of being “made in his image and likeness” is referring to the light-body instead of the physical body. This is just a hypothesis because it has not been fully disclosed to me.

The Soul

The energy of Divine Love swiftly filled me and I knew another wave was upon me. My emotions were not excluded, but my experience of this love surpassed them. I was swimming in an ocean of love. It was outside of me; it permeated me and originated from within me at the same time. It was eternal, with no end in sight, either in time or space.

From within this perception, an image of a human being appeared unlike any image I’ve ever seen. It had life and depth of existence, not like looking at a movie or picture. I was seeing myself without realizing it.

There was a translucent outline of a human body suspended within an oval array of light. The generic form or a template of the human body in which it will use to manifest itself into the physical realm. This body was attached to the oval at the solar plexus area where it derived its energy of existence. The human-shaped body that appeared to have its own unique light that was very soft looking and more dense than the oval. The body existed as an integrated extension of the oval with its own uniqueness.

The Spiritual Realm

Spiritual [spir-i-choo-uhl]

Relating to, or consisting of spirit; incorporeal; of or relating to the spirit or soul, as distinguished from the physical nature. Not referring to moral, ethical human values or behavior. Not referring to the inner state of mind achieved by many during meditation. I am using the word in its purest meaning, the non-physical, non-emotional, non-human realm, beyond the human veil from which the soul and Divine presence exists.

My mind went blank then was swiftly filled by another wave. The tunnel in front of me opened up completely as if I had passed through it to the other side. Without turning my head I could visually see all around me, front, sides and back all at the same time. My awareness of the surroundings within the spiritual realm was also connected to my feelings in some way which allowed me to not only see, but experience this dimension.

The space or what we would call air, was energy. Alive with intelligence and awareness, every molecule was fluid and gave off a faint purplish glow as they were linked together through an eternal space. Nothing was solid but combination of energy and light, similar to a holographic projection.

I began moving my hand back and forth in front of me, swirling it through a mist of energy and light. With the purity of a child exploring a new phenomena, I could see and feel the energy from the spiritual realm move through my outstretched hand as I played with it. Both the physical and spiritual aspects of my hand blended seamlessly into one object yet retained their distinct uniqueness.

Death

Right then, I felt a surge of elevation as my spirit soared to a new height of vibration. I was no longer aware of Martha’s presence or of being in her living room where my body sat. I didn’t care because I was completely at peace. It was a wonderful place to be, so alive and filled with energy.

I found myself standing on the edge of a chasm and was being pulled from the other side. The chasm seemed to be void of the energy that existed in this realm and I could not see to the other side but knew something was there. I still felt connected to my body and vaguely remember looking down over my left shoulder and seeing myself and Martha sitting on the couch. I sensed an energetic thread attaching me to my body below and began feeling the desire to have it cut.

Then I was pulled from beyond the chasm at my solar plexus and felt the snapping of the chord attached to my body. As I passed through the threshold, I experienced the transformation from being a spirit bound to the earth (the physical dimension) into an eternal spirit connected to God and the entire universe. In an instant I was completely set free from death and all the fears associated to it. I was taken through the process of physical death and transformed into an eternal spirit, radiating like a star pulsating with light and love. This was breathtaking and overwhelming and yet felt so natural. I had gone home. This is what I have always sought and dreamed of in my life. This level of existence was freeing.

Reincarnation

In early 1995, while cooking chicken in a frying pan, I left the room and it began smoking, setting off the fire alarm. Rushing back into the kitchen, searing pain ripped through my abdomen, dropping me to the floor, doubled over. Hearing the sound of burning food, I forced myself up to move the pan off the heat. The smoke smelled like wood instead of food and the alarm was sounding but I could not get up.

A dimension opened. The face of a dark hair, dark eyed woman looking out the window of a house being consumed by fire appeared. Feeling the horrible pain of the loss of love, I curled up in a ball, crying for 10 minutes.

Hours later, I came across my sketch book from years ago next to Ashtyn’s bed. There she was, the woman in my vision was the same woman I sketched over and over using charcoal.

The Physical Realm

Everyday for five weeks, I meditated on my rock overlooking a 1,000 foot cliff in the Rio Grande Gorge, even in 5 degree weather. I loved it.

My life at the time was happy and content, so it was difficult to find the level of heart-felt motivation required for another spiritual experience. I kept pushing myself, asking for the desire to well up inside me. After weeks, it began to seem that I had lost the ability to connect with the Divine until one day I cried out with tears of longing…

“Where are you?” flowed from my mouth with the tears of intense longing.

“I am here.” rang through me with the deepest of vibrations.

Filling me with the presence of Divine Love again, my shadow (mask) was removed and I was released from the human construct. Divine energy emanated through every molecule, connecting me to all of it.

The physical transformed into a translucent holographic structure, no longer holding the staunch reality of density, but a projection of light. Large Fibonacci lines of energy, interwoven like fabric, were like a grid-system creating the three dimensions of height, width and depth. As each line intersected with another, a discernible point of power formed.

Consciousness

Divine Consciousness [dih-vahyn] [kon-shuhs-nis]

The absolute being who is the source and life-force of our existence. Pre-physical realm; pre-time and space. Beyond our comprehension, names and religions. Personally experienced through the conduit of The Soul and filtered into human consciousness as the prism of fifty shades (degrees) of light and love.

Soul Consciousness [sohl] [kon-shuhs-nis]

Post-Divine Consciousness; pre-human Consciousness; existing between physical and absolute. The awareness and perception originating from the soul’s point of view that includes both understanding of human perspective along with aspects of Divine consciousness. The soul, a non-material spiritual essence is the aspect of ourselves that survives physical death. It is the fusion of Divine spirit with our distinct personality and consciousness.

Human Consciousness [hyoo-muhn] [kon-shuhs-nis]

Post-Soul Consciousness; Pre-Human Mind; the internal awareness of one’s existence outside of cerebral thought and interpretation; bound to the human construct; can be spiritualized by The Soul and perceived from outside itself. Easily mistaken for the Soul Consciousness. Existing behind the human veil between mind and soul.

For purposes of discussion, can be categorized into three segments: Lower Self, Normal Self and Higher Self. Each contains its own levels of thoughts based on the amount of Divine energy and light flowing into the Human Consciousness. (See Consciousness Slider)

Human Mind [hyoo-muhn] [mayhnd]

Post-Human Consciousness; the psyche does not survive physical death. Includes the emotional, cognitive, rational and analytical processes. Using the five senses as the primary source of information therefore limited to its own relative existence. Bound to the biological systems of the body. Capable of functioning strictly as a biological entity without spirit infusion. Inability to spiritualize itself, but can be spiritualized through Soul Consciousness.

Human Thought [hyoo-muhn] [thawt]

The mind’s way of internally translating energy into imagery then into a learned language. Not necessarily reality; always relative truth due to the limited nature of the mind.

The Human Veil

I became spirit. Then something like a holographic fortress surrounded my human mind, shifting my consciousness from spirit to human by reflecting back to me my human oriented beliefs, thoughts, perceptions and limited physical senses in an array that resembled a stained-glass window. I absolutely believed what I thought to be true.

This mask, or veil (as I named it), is the shadow that filters out the higher vibrations of light emanating from The Divine through my soul.

The purpose of this veil is to effectively cause the densification of the energy of Divine light to solidify into what I can only perceive as a solid physical realm, turning my reality of a spiritual entity into a physical entity. Incorrectly defining it as the real-world, I could no longer see beyond my human-self.

This was the first lie I told myself and the lie from which all others are formed. This created the first pain, the pain of loss of direct connection with Divine Love and the pain from which all other pains evolve.

They showed me that as I’ve looked out from my human mind, through the years, my beliefs, self image and perceptions are constantly re-formed because they are based on the current condition of my mask.

Everything my human-self knows, including my spiritual beliefs and my interpretation of spiritual or religious text, is the result of truth being filtered through my mask. Therefore, to the human, truth is relative. If I cannot viscerally feel the presence of the energy of Divine Love, my mind formulates false conclusions and believes them as reality.

Manifesting

To Reveal With Clarity

Manifest – man·i·fest | \ ˈma-nə-ˌfest \
to reveal with clarity; to make apparent; easily perceived by the mind; obvious; commonly mistaken for create.

Most commonly misconstrued to mean create into existence, but it simply means to reveal with clarity. Why is this an important distinction? Because, as a construct of the physical, the human mind does not create energy. Energy simply passes through it from another deeper source.

I am aware that from the limited human perspective it appers as if the human mind creates, but once a person sees from outside the confines of the mind, it becomes clear that the human mind can only rearrange or redirect energy.  Therefore, the real power of bringing our desires into physical reality lies within our ability to reveal what already exists as an energetic possibility.

These are a few ways energy manifests into our physical reality:

1. At Birth: The unconscious energetic systems such as our DNA, personality, character proclivities, neurology and brain chemistry are the roots that immediately begin governing the trajectory of our life into activities that align with our mind and body’s energy. But because we cannot see these systems at work, we believe we choose these directions based on what we like or dislike. But in reality, these are the fundamental autonomic responses guiding our lives a generalized manner.
2. Environmental: Becoming less generalized, external influences within our environment begin shaping our lives like branches sprouting from the root. What the eyes see, the mind believes. As we perceive our family, peers, society, geographic, economic and religious systems from our limited point of view, belief systems are formed based on our perception of reality, which we come to believe as true. These beliefs become manifest (revealed) within our interactions with the world.
3. Human Desires: As part of the human condition and beyond the superfluous whims of our lives, exists the energetic systems of aspirations… the ever pervasive longing for the fulfillment of a dream. Inherent in each is an equal and opposite energy system, which, if overcome, facilitates our Character Arc (the transformation from one state of mind into another). To vivaciously pursue a dream is to unlock a key to our own personal transformation. Because each human desire is born of lack of the visceral experience of Divine presence, the spiritually conscious pursuit of a desire will manifest (reveal) the personalized path toward the fulfillment of the Unconscious Desire of perceiving Divine presence.
4. Will Power: Consciously – Manifesting (revealing) the energy behind a desire by exerting one’s will power into the physical realm and rearranging or establishing external energy systems (interaction between people or objects) that reflect the projected outcome of the desire. Can be anything from tying one’s shoe lace to forming a business. Each requires a person to exert the level of energy in the particular manner required to accomplish the task.
5. The Soul: Consciously – Pursuing the physical manifestation of our dreams and aspirations with the conscious intent of allowing the Soul to reveal itself within our Character Arc (the elevating of our consciousness through the dramas of life), engages the Soul consciousness. This realigns us with the existing energy systems within us that are capable of becoming manifest. Instead of trying to bend reality to our desire, our desire bends to reality. The end result is the fulfillment of our desire.

Human Desires (Aspirations)

Desire is the Hope of Fulfillment

Desire [dih-zahyuhr]
a strong feeling of wanting something to happen with the expectation of satisfaction.

Aspiration [as-puh-rey-shuhn]
A persistent ambition fueled by an underlying desire to achieve a specific outcome.

Our soul implants deep, heartfelt desires and aspirations within our human psyche at birth. These are designed for our individual personality to facilitate the evolutionary transformation of our Human Consciousness into Soul Consciousness through human experiences that cause a Character Arc (the transformation from one state of mind into another).

Thus, when we strive to achieve our aspirations, whether big or small, we harness our soul’s energy to align the universe in a way that facilitates our mental and spiritual transformation. Achieving the Object of our Desire is insignificant to the soul but paramount to the human. This misleads human perception toward obtaining the Object of Desire rather than the journey of transformation. But it is the carrot.

The soul facilitates the experience of our personalized Arc through the pursuit of these aspirations, neutralizing each one as we come to the end of ourselves, allowing us to eventually see beyond our desires into the realm of Divine presence. Integral to the human experience, these energy systems remain with us until neutralized.

False (Limited) Perceptions

Great fear ripped through the core of my being. Not fear of being harmed, but fear of being caught in a lie. Pulling back the curtain to my human-self, I became both the deceiver and the deceived.

“I am undone..! I am trapped within myself..! What will I do?” I was suspended in time without hope of escape.

I became spirit. Then something like a holographic fortress surrounded my human mind, shifting my consciousness from spirit to human by reflecting back to me my human oriented beliefs, thoughts, perceptions and limited physical senses in an array that resembled a stained-glass window. I absolutely believed what I thought to be true.

This mask, or veil (as I named it), is the shadow that filters my ability to see beyond myself. This limits my ability to feel my own spirit, causing me to experience myself as a human being rather than a spirit being.

This was the first lie I told myself and the lie from which all others are formed. This created the first pain, the pain of loss of direct connection with Divine Love and the pain from which all other pains evolve.

They showed me that as I’ve looked out from my human mind, through the years, my beliefs, self image and perceptions are constantly re-formed because they are based on the current condition of my mask.

Everything my human-self knows, including my spiritual beliefs and my interpretation of spiritual or religious text, is the result of truth being filtered through my mask. Therefore, to the human, truth is relative. If I cannot viscerally feel the presence of the energy of Divine Love, my mind formulates false conclusions and believes them as reality.

Knowles came to expose me to myself (please allow me to introduce myself) from outside my human consciousness. Removing the mask shifted my vantage point to see from outside my own ego (that which creates the awareness of the human-self, “I”). This changed everything.

Emotional Pain

The Perceived Absence of Divine Love

Gazing over the calm ocean, I settled into the familiar calm state of diminished thought. Passing in front of me, a man caught my eye.

A twinkling star, radiating out a few feet out from his body to form an oval, filled me with compassion. Sensing his life’s struggles, I felt the unhappiness of his existence in the pit of my stomach. He had closed himself off to the awareness of deep emotional pain. Seeing his spirit buried underneath, my heart wept, without a critical thought.

The sun moved across the sky as each person’s spirit passed before me. Experiencing the compassionate non-judgmental love of Knowles, their lives were transparent, their struggles, the threads of human existence. I knew them… They were me!

At the core of their unhappiness was a recurring theme, the inability to touch into the flow of Divine Spirit. Without knowing the presence of this love, they were lost, adrift in a sea of emptiness, paddling in circles with their human desires toward temporary fulfillment while avoiding touching the emotional pains of life. Their burred pains becoming layers of false perceptions further distancing themselves from their own spirit.

Then a unique and beautiful spirit passed before me. A physically adept women, jogging, splashing in the surf with each beat, adorning a clear spirit, unfettered by emotional pain. Her spiritual beauty was unmatched. I watched her until no longer visible. I saw the possibility.

An Excerpt from The Spirit Awakens

and

Concept in the book The Spiritual Archaeologist

Fear

The Anticipation of Pain

Experiencing fear is a response to the anticipation of pain. Fear is an alert system designed to make us pay attention to an eminent threat by feeling it as a great discomfort in our body. Generally, we feel fear in our solar plexus, or we might say in the pit of our stomach. We all hate this feeling because we are suppose to pay attention to it, not avoid it.

Experiencing fear, is one form of responding to emotional pain. It is like recoiling from the flame. But before we have touched fire for the first time, we do not fear it. Once touched, we remember the pain. This memory allows us to anticipate similar pain, keeping us from harm. This anticipation, we call fear. Therefore, fear is the anticipation of pain.

Fear comes in different forms and strengths, from stop my heart fear to slightly avoiding fear. Normally calibrated for an appropriate response toward a perceived threat, our reaction span the range of fight or flight. It is the perfect defense mechanism to steer us away from harmful situations because it biochemically communicates with our body. Fear forms from our perception in our minds, but we feel it in our abdomen.

Anticipating pain, both emotional and physical, stimulate biochemical reactions in our brains. When anticipating pain stops, the biochemical and emotional reactions also stop as the chemicals causing heightened states of fight or flight diminish, allowing our bodies to relax.

As a general rule, physical pain is a function of the body’s nervous system reacting to physical events but emotional pain is a function of the human psyche.

While it is healthy to fear and avoid physical pain, it is unhealty to avoid emotional pain because it gets buried within our psyche and causes us to replay the drama.  These symptoms can also appear in our bodies as ailments and within our relationships as dysfunctional interactions, especially toward those we love.

Concept from the book The Spiritual Archaeologist

Anger

The Expression of Pain

Experiencing anger, is another form of responding to emotional pain. It is like yelling when we hit our thumb with a hammer. In other words, we are angry because we are hurting, not because all of a sudden anger appears out of nowhere. All anger is born from pain.

While it might not seem like it in the moment, this is actually our brain’s way of trying to protect us from that hurt. When we feel pain, be it physical or emotional, our first instinct is to do whatever we can to make it stop. And so, when we feel emotional pain, our brain looks for a way to make that pain go away. One way it does this is by redirecting our attention to something else—something that will cause us to feel anger instead.

When we’re angry, we focus on causing pain rather than feeling pain. While this might not be the healthiest way of dealing with our problems, it is certainly a way. This defense mechanism is designed to help us cope with the emotional pain we’re feeling.

Anger also has the added benefit of being able to derive pleasure from expressing the pain. It soothes the savage beast, which is the horrific feeling of emotional pain.

Because emotional pain is the absence of love, anger is the perfect reflection of this. Devoid of love, its intent is to inflict pain onto another. Thus, the cycle of pain flows from one to another for generations.

Concept from the book The Spiritual Archaeologist